There’s a constant battle going on inside our head and our heart. It’s the battle between doing what I feel like doing and doing what God wants me to do.  This month’s Double Date with Mark and Jill dives deep into this struggle and explores how to find personal victory that strengthens our marriage.



TRANSCRIPT:  My-Way-or-Gods-Way-Transcript.pdf

Talk About It:

What are your thoughts about this statement: The condition of our heart is directly correlated to the condition of our marriage.

Which one of us struggles more with honesty?  with shame?  with pride? with insecurity?

What are your thoughts about this statement: When we surrender, we stop fighting with God. We accept his ways even if we don’t understand them.

Are we characterized by doing our own business with God before doing business with each other?

How can I pray for you this week?

Think About It:

What are the deeper issues going on in my heart that fuels pain in my marriage?  (control, shame, pride, anger, insecurity, etc)

Have I accepted Christ as Savior?   Have I accepted Christ as Lord of my life?  (If you want to talk with Mark or Jill specifically about these two questions, please email them directly at or

Can I truly say, “God, I will do whatever you ask,” or do I “dance with obedience and try to manage things to go my way?

Can I identify times where there’s an internal battle happening between what I want to do and what God wants me to do?

Am I characterized by doing my own business with God before doing business with my spouse?

Am I functioning under the world’s mindset that I know what’s best rather than God knows what’s best?

Am I characterized by dying to self?  (More of God and less of me?)

As you look at those places where you bump into each other’s imperfect, as you look at those places where you continue to have issues over and over again, what part of self is in there?

Quotes and Notes:

Proverbs 18:21—”The tongue has the power of life and death.”

John 3:30—”He must become great; I must become less.”

“Often what God asks us to do goes against what we FEEL like doing.”

Romans 12:9-21, “Outdo one another showing honor.” “Repay no one evil for evil.”

“The more you deal with the condition of your heart, the better the condition of your marriage will be.”