Nov 26, 2024
Too often we look at our marriage through a lens of lack.
When that happens, we need to intentionally move our eyes to see what we do have.
This Design-A-Date allows us to focus on what we appreciate about each other AND take the time to communicate those things.
Head to a coffee shop or simply snuggle up on the couch with a paper and pen.
Jot down all the things you appreciate about your spouse by finishing this sentence, “I’m thankful you ______________________ or “I’m thankful for __________________________.”
Once you’ve identified a list of 10 or 12 things you are thankful for, take time to communicate to each other what you’re thankful for AND why you’re thankful for it (what you appreciate about it, how that character trait makes your life easier, etc.)
End with a one minute full body hug, just standing and holding each other for a minute.
Print out Date Night here:
Thankful-Date-Night.png
Jun 20, 2024
Most of us have a deck of Uno cards in the house. (If you don’t, pick up a set the next time you’re at the store so you can have fun with this date!)
This date has you playing a game together AND creating connection in your marriage at the same time.
Here’s how the date works:
Play the game according to the instructions. When certain cards are played pause and do the following:
- Draw Two—Share two things you appreciate about your spouse. (One thing I appreciate about you is…)
- Draw Four—Kiss for four seconds.
- Reverse—Share a favorite memory you have of time together–it can be when you were dating or in your marriage life together. (A favorite memory of you and I is when…)
- Wild Card—Share something that’s on your bucket list or that you dream about doing together in the future. (One thing I dream about us doing is…)
- Skip—Gaze in each other’s eyes for five seconds.
Finally, once someone yells wins, celebrate with a 10-second holding hug!
Laugh, have fun, and enjoy connection with this easy date night you can do at home!
You can print this date out here:
Uno-Date-Night.pdf
May 31, 2023
Several years ago, we saw a book in a bookstore titled Your Spouse Isn’t the Person You Married. It was an intriguing title that pulled us in so we stood there quite some time reading the pages aloud to each other.
The premise of the book is that we change and grow over the years and sometimes we don’t stay connected to each other’s hearts in a way that allows us to be aware of those changes. Life gets busy and our communication becomes about the logistics of life rather than what’s going on inside our spouse’s head and heart.
With that in mind, we want to encourage you to get a special dessert to share and invite your spouse to this “Interview Me” Design-a-Date. The key to making this date successful is that when you’re asking the questions you maintain a curious mindset. You listen to understand, and you resist the urge to add any of your own thoughts or comments.
Your only response when you’re interviewing is something affirming like “Thank you for sharing.” Or “That’s good to know.” You can also invite them to share more by simply saying, “Tell me more about that.”
Once your spouse has answered all the questions, switch roles and let them interview you!
What’s something you love to do and haven’t done in a while?
What are three words you feel best describe you?
What’s the best thing about being the age that you are right now?
What do you worry about the most?
What helps you feel better when you’re upset or stressed?
What would you like us to do more of as a couple?
If we could live anywhere in the world, where would you like to live?
What’s the most beautiful place you’ve ever seen?
What’s one thing on your bucket list that you’d like to do sometime?
What are you most proud of in your life?
What’s weighing heavy on you right now?
What’s the most surprising thing that happened to you last year?
What do you think your best qualities are?
What’s one way I can be praying for you right now?
You can print out “The Interview Date” here so you both can have a copy in hand:
The-Interview-Date.pdf
Good marriages don’t just happen. They’re created one conversation at a time!
Mar 2, 2023
Most of us love chocolate so this date has you exploring different chocolate tastes and talking about what you like and don’t like.
This is an at-home date that you can enjoy after the kids are in bed, or anytime if you don’t have kids or your kids are grown.
What you need:
·2 pieces of paper and pens
·Sharpie
·A variety box of chocolates
What you do:
·Remove the paper that tells you what the different chocolates are and tuck it away to refer to later.
·Number the squares the chocolates are in with a sharpie.
·Cut each chocolate in half or in quarters, if you prefer smaller tastes.
·Take turns feeding each other a chocolate. Write down the number of the box you tried and guess what the flavor is from your taste test.
·Enjoy guessing, laughing, and discovering each of your likes and dislikes.
·When you make it through as much of the box as you desire, pull out the paper that tells you the flavors and see how many you each guessed correctly!
Enjoy!
The-Chocolate-Date-PDF.png
Nov 8, 2022
Planned spontaneity can be a great way to mix things up and do something different. This date also takes decision-making off the table. You do what you draw!
Once you “create” this date, you can use it over and over again!
What you need:
- 1 piece of paper
- pen
- two bags
Create the date:
Cut a piece of paper into 20 strips.
Write the names of ten restaurants on ten of the slips–one restaurant per slip.
Then on the other ten strips, write an activity you can do together.
Activity ideas might include:
- Bowling
- Hiking
- Ax Throwing (yes there are places in many communities that offer this!)
- Playing a board game
- Putt Putt golfing
- Zoo
- Movie
- Museum (specify specific museums nearby)
Make it happen:
Put the restaurant strips in one bag and the activity strips in another bag. Shake the bags and draw one restaurant and one activity. You now have the plan, so head out and make it happen!
Print out the date here:
Pick-a-Place.pdf
