The Bible tells us that love is patient and kind. Too often we rationalize why it’s okay for us to be impatient and unkind due to the circumstances we’re navigating. In this short Double Date with Mark and Jill we explore the connection that patience and kindness have to love.
The-Kindness-Challenge.pdfTalk about it:
What is one takeaway or personal challenge you have from this teaching on patience and kindness?
If I rated myself on patience in our marriage, on a scale of 1-10 with 1 being not patient at all and 10 being very patient, I would rate myself a __________.
If you rated me on patience in our marriage, on a scale of 1-10 with 1 being not patient at all and 10 being very patient, what would you rate me? (Be prepared to receive this feedback openly and with humility.)
If I rated myself on kindness in our marriage, on a scale of 1-10 with 1 being not kind at all and 10 being very kind, I would rate myself a __________.
If you rated me on kindness in our marriage, on a scale of 1-10 with 1 being not patient at all and 10 being very kind, what would you rate me? (Be prepared to receive this feedback openly and with humility.)
Think about it:
Patience and kindness are a fruit of the Spirit and a reflection of our love. If I’m not patient and kind, I am not loving. How well am I loving my spouse through patience and kindness?
How am I doing accepting my spouse’s differences as a way of expressing love to him/her?
Is it evident to my spouse that God is leading my heart or is it more evident that my emotions are leading my heart?
Notes and Quotes
If we aren’t accepting our spouse’s differences it leads to unkindness. This is fueled by our thinking.
We can learn to express our anger, frustration, and hurt with the fruits of the Spirit.
Patience and kindness are my responsibility, and are not based upon the good or bad actions of another person.
Process for untangling anger: 1) express anger to God, 2) Sort through my anger and emotion in order to discover why I’m angry (possibly with the help of another person, counselor, or coach), 3) Untangle my anger and emotions with my God Tools (forgiveness, grace, and acceptance), and ask for a safe conversation with my spouse.
Galatians 5:22-23 NLT “But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.”
1 Corinthians 13:4 NLT “Love is patient and kind…”
Recommendation:
The Kindness Challenge by Shaunti Feldhahn
