Jul 23, 2024
We had a great conversation with Tony and Alisa DiLorenzo! Their podcast, One Extraordinary Marriage, challenges listeners to make their marriage a priority. Tony and Alisa are honest about the ups and downs of their marriage because they understand that others need real, everyday examples. They want others to know that they aren’t alone. Listen in to hear more about their story and their journey of over 28 years of marriage!
Talk About It
1. What is a way that we can carve out time for focused conversation and intentional connection?
2. Where are some of the places we tend to get “stuck” in our marriage?
3. In what area could we use an outside perspective?
Think About It
1. Can you name a pivotal “I’ve got a choice” moment in your life? Is there any area that needs a reality check right now?
2. In a challenging situation, do you think you tend to explode, or shut down? Do you get defensive? How can you communicate about that with your spouse?
3. What is one “small action” like Alisa mentioned that you could choose to do that would have an “astronomical impact” on your marriage?
Notes and Quotes
- You can be fully present as a parent, and fully present as a spouse.
- “Grab each other’s hands, go shoulder-to-shoulder, we’re on the same team.”
- “How do we support one another? Sometimes it’s giving each other some space, sometimes it’s getting in each other’s faces.”
- It’s important to know when to get outside help. Sometimes an experienced third party can really help a couple work through tough seasons in their marriage.
- So much of making our marriage the best it can be is how we lead ourselves to change the dynamics that we bring to the table. Most couples don’t understand their personal responsibility in marriage enough.
Jun 20, 2024
It’s time for a really honest Q&A session about sex. Dr. Jennifer Degler joins us to answer YOUR questions about sex!
Here are the two resources mentioned in this video:
Questions to Talk About Sex as a Couple from Dr. Jennifer Degler:
Questions-To-Help-Couples-Have-a-Great-Sex-Life-Discussion.pdf
Married Dance Website Use DATENIGHT coupon code for 10% off
Apr 8, 2024
Reese and VaLisa Palmer are marriage counselors and marriage coaches. They have a passion for helping couples create the marriage they long for. Understanding how childhood affects your marriage is the topic of this conversation that you absolutely have to listen to!
Talk About It
If we had to name our negative pattern that we sometimes get in, what would we call it?
What are some of our “echoes from the past” from each of our childhoods that are affecting our marriage now?
Is there anything from previous generations–generational patterns–that’s affecting our marriage now? (if you identify any, take time to pray together to ask God to stop that with you.)
Think About It
What expectations did I bring into marriage from my family of origin?
Am I the withdrawer or the pursuer?
Where do I need to be more self-aware of how my childhood wounds are covered landmines in our marriage?
Notes and Quotes
Understanding attachment is a game-changer for marriage.
Anxious Attachment = Pursuer
Avoidant Attachment = Withdrawer
Your communication problems go back to when you were 4-years-old!
EFT–Emotionally Focused Therapy (attachment theory therapy)
Feb 20, 2024
With their trademark insight, humor, and candid personal perspectives, Bill and Pam Farrel reveal the truths about the sexual relationship in marriage and what husbands and wives need to know to keep the embers burning.
Talk About It
In what ways can you see how the waffles and spaghetti analogy happens in our marriage?
Marriage changes every 7 years so we get to redesign our relationship and our sex life. If we could more intentionally “design our sex life,” what would you add to the design?
What is one small change we can make to feel more connected outside the bedroom so we’re laying a firm foundation for our sexual intimacy?
Think About It
What are some of the thoughts in my head about sex that aren’t helping me? How do I need to change my thinking?
What are some of the thoughts in my head about my spouse that aren’t helping me? How do I need to align my thinking with what God says about my spouse?
Notes and Quotes
Sex is designed to be a relational decision between a husband and a wife.
The sexiest thing we can ever do is maintain a curious mindset about our spouse.
When she knows he cares about what she thinks, that’s alluring to her.
What’s OK in Sex = YES:
Yielded to one another
Extended in Love
Secure with Privacy (no one else, no porn, etc)
Oct 27, 2023
How do we handle it as individuals and as a couple when disappointment and grief are our reality? Are we sensitive to each other’s needs? Do we understand the importance of grief? Do we understand that grief happens in times where a “funeral” doesn’t happen? In this compelling conversation, Jill talks with Chuck and Ashley Elliott about handling grief well together when life disappoints.
Talk About It:
What “used to be’s” do you feel we’ve had in our life?
What is a disappointment or loss you experienced in childhood? How was that emotional pain handled?
What do you need from me when you’re sad, disappointed, or grieving?
Think About It:
What loss have I experienced that I may not thought of as grief?
What unrealized dreams do I have that I’ve buried and never really grieved? Can I have a funeral for this to help me move on?
Notes and Quotes
When we don’t identify grief, it’s hard to move on.
There’s healing that frees you up for whatever could be next.
What does it look like for me to be emotionally available and present for whatever opportunity is next?
